Accidental Arrangements Read online

  “Let me guess… frozen pizza?” Lily asked as she opened the driver’s seat door and slid inside.

  And I held onto it as I corrected, “Nourishment.”

  “Right. I’ll see you guys later.”

  I closed the door for her, giving her hood a pat before heading back towards the apartment only to find Jules a solid twenty feet ahead of me.

  “Yo, Jules. Wait up,” I called after her, doing a little jog to catch up.

  But my words did nothing to stop her surprisingly long strides as she tossed over her shoulder, “What do you want, Levi?”

  “I’m… sorry. For pressing you like that about your dad and stuff. It’s not my place to be all in your business this early in the game.”

  She finally acknowledged my pursuit, stopping in the frame of her bedroom door to say, “Correction; It’s never your place to be in my business. The quicker you learn that, the better off you’ll be.”

  “Jules, wait…”

  My sentence was cut short by her slamming the door in my face similarly to the way I had done to her just that morning. And while I had only done it to get back at her for her little tampon stunt, I could tell her version was a response to something much deeper.

  &

  Cars were hard.

  Selling cars was even harder.

  I thought my “celebrity” status would be my best marketing tool as far as my commission was concerned. And while people were definitely thrilled to meet me, take pictures with me, and even ask for my autograph, when it came to actually making a sale, they all managed to back out before I could get them to sign on the dotted line.

  I was already yanking at the stupid tie I was forced to wear at the dealership as I strolled into the apartment that was eerily dark and quiet, the only signs of Jules being the lingering perfume and burnt hair smell in the air. I could pretty much assume she was still pissed from the night before, purposely avoiding me even if that meant her going into work early just to ensure she wouldn’t run into me.

  But then again, maybe I was giving myself too much credit. Maybe the perfume and burnt hair was in preparation for a date with one of the annoying booty call niggas; a little meet-up for a quickie to get her through the work night.

  “Damn, you sound jealous,” I thought to myself as I flipped on the light switch for the kitchen only to find a bouquet of flowers on the counter. My curiosity got the best of me, forcing me to take a peek at the card tucked in a holder between the lilies.

  “I know these are your favorite. Miss you, Julia. XOXO Charlie.”

  “Julia? Who the hell is Julia?” I said out loud as I struggled to stuff the card back into its rightful place just as I heard the resounding sound of keys jingling at the front door.

  And the second Jules noticed me, her face pulled into a tight scowl. “Exactly why are you going through my shit?”

  “I… I thought maybe they were for me,” I lied, earning me a stiff eye roll as she slipped past me to the fridge.

  She made herself busy moving around some of the groceries I had bought, quickly getting annoyed as she replied, “You know good and well those weren’t yours, Levi. Why haven’t you learned how to mind your own business yet? I mean, you obviously have plenty of shit of your own to worry about. Oh wait. No you don’t. Everybody does it for you.”

  “Wow. That’s a cheap shot,” I told her just as she slammed the refrigerator door shut, leaving empty-handed.

  “It’s a true shot. A game winner. You know all about that, don’t you?” she asked as she headed for her bedroom.

  And I was right on her heels, even following her inside so that I could question, “Who’s Charlie?”

  “Who’s Levi?” she fired back as she left me to head for her closet that I was seeing for the first time. It was almost double the size of mine.

  “He your ex?” I asked as I leaned against the frame of the door while she blew through the hangers trying to find something to wear.

  And it was obvious she was a talented multi-tasker, looking for clothes while also finding the wit to challenge, “Is he yours? I mean, you thought the flowers were for you, right?”

  “Jules, come on. I’m just asking you a simple question,” I reasoned, trying to bring things back to a neutral playing field.

  But I was hardly surprised when Jules didn’t comply as she yanked a dress from the rack and replied, “So am I.” Then she slipped past me and headed for her bathroom, closing the door behind her in attempt to end the conversation as usual.

  I stood outside of the door, leaning against the wall as I tried to figure out my next move. I could let her win, leave it alone, and mind my business as she asked me to. Or I could… keep going, work harder, and get my question answered.

  Since it was clear my current approach wasn’t working, I tried a better, more passive one when I yelled through the door. “Look. I shouldn’t have been looking at your stuff. You’re right, that was wrong of me.”

  “Glad you noticed,” she shouted back.

  “So is he your ex? Somebody I need to worry about showing up here?” I asked, attempting to turn the issue into something different as a way to get her to spill the beans.

  But once again, Jules didn’t budge as she yanked the door open and breezed past me when she answered, “Maybe he is. Maybe he isn’t.”

  “Jules, I’m serious. I’m not tryna get into a fight with a stranger cause he thinks I’m here tryna get at his girl,” I told her as I watched her dig through the pile of heels in the corner of her room, deciding on a pair that easily gave her an extra five and a half inches.

  And she was already busy shoving her feet inside when she stiffly replied, “I’m not his girl.”

  “So he’s…”

  “He’s a person who sent Julia flowers,” she answered as if that helped to clear up anything, though the response did prompt another equally important question.

  “Well who the hell is Julia?”

  “My mother,” she tossed over her shoulder as she turned off the light in her bedroom, leaving me in the dark as she headed for the front door.

  And again I was forced to catch up with her so that I could ask, “Why is someone sending your mother flowers to your apartment?”

  Her hand was already on the doorknob when she turned back my way wearing the same scowl she had on when she first saw me. “Why do you care? This shit was never any of your business to begin with.” Then she turned the knob and added, “I gotta get to work.”

  “But I’m not done talking to you,” I told her as she stepped out, attempting to close the door behind her.

  And she only rolled her eyes when I caught it, continuing to follow her tracks even when she insisted, “Well I’m done talking to you.”

  “Jules, you can’t keep shutting me out like this for no reason.”

  “I can and I will until you get the damn picture. Or do you need somebody to decode that for you too?” she asked as she used her key to unlock her car door before climbing inside.

  And this time I was catching the car door instead of the front door as I told her, “Man, you can chill with all that. For real.”

  “And you can grow the hell up. For real,” she fired back as she tried to yank the door from my hold.

  “Grow up? The only one being childish is you.”

  “Childish? Really, Levi? I’m being childish because you can’t seem to get it through your thick ass head that my business, my life, doesn’t concern you? Contrary to popular belief, I’m not your fan. Hell, I’m not even your friend. We’re roommates. Sharing a space. That’s it. So stay in your fuckin’ lane and quit trying to barge into mine before I run your ass over.”

  Jules

  “You know this is exactly what your ass gets, right? Trying to go for the eye candy only to end up with an annoyingly nosey roommate. I mean, I was just sure you’d be throwing that ass back by now.”

  While Elizabeth was laughing at my pain over the phone, I could only roll my eyes as I made the drive to T
he Max. I still couldn’t believe how much Levi had managed to get under my skin in such a short period of time, going from the lusty eye candy that Liz had already mentioned to a complete pain in my ass.

  What a waste of talent.

  “I really wish this was as funny as you’re trying to make it. I mean, you know it takes a lot for me to really be mad at something these days. And let me tell you, my knuckles are turning red as we speak,” I admitted as I gripped the steering wheel even tighter to help alleviate the stress.

  But apparently my best friend had a better alternative as she suggested, “So maybe you should be throwing that ass back. Fuck out all of that frustration you have built up and get a fresh start.”

  I shook my head at her nonsense, cracking the slightest smile even when I told her, “You’re not helping, Liz. It’s like the more he runs his mouth, the more unattractive he gets. I’m just waiting for him to say something for me to officially draw a line of fire.”

  Elizabeth sounded less than convinced as she repeated, “A line of fire? What could he possibly say for that to really happen, Jules?”

  I shrugged as if she could see me. “I don’t know. He thinks women only belong in the kitchen. Or he… supported Trump.”

  That made her laugh. “So you’re going to write him off for his political views?”

  “That shit has nothing to do with politics. That’s a vote of conscience. Or lack thereof. Hell, I may just have to kill him off for that. Like Nat Turner said, if you’re not down with the cause, you gotta go.”

  “I thought you said you didn’t see that movie?” she asked just as I was pulling into the employee lot, taking note of the fact that the regular lot was already packed meaning it was bound to be a long Monday night.

  I turned off the car, unbuckling my seatbelt as I replied, “I didn’t. I just saw somebody say something about it on Twitter. But anyway, let me get into work before I get all riled up again and end up cussing out a customer for no reason.”

  Again, Elizabeth laughed as she insisted, “Jules, it’ll be fine. I mean, he can’t possibly be stupid enough to keep trying you, right?”

  I sighed as I used one hand to keep my phone close while I climbed out of the car, giving a silent wave to Hope who was also just showing up for our shift. “I sure hope not. But after talking to his sister, I’m not so sure. I mean, if anybody, she would know. And she didn’t exactly seem confident in his basic life skills.”

  It was honestly amusing to see the interactions between him and his sister; their closeness obvious, though it almost seemed like Lily was more of a mother to him than a sibling. And that was another thing that hadn’t come up in my Levi-research; information about his parents.

  Naturally, I wondered if his family dynamics were anywhere near as hectic as mine.

  “He’s survived twenty plus years in this world as a black man. That means he’s gotta have some kind of skills, right?” Elizabeth asked as I stopped just short of the employee entrance to finish our conversation.

  And even though she had definitely made a solid point, I pretended to be less than enthused when I told her, “Girl… if you say so. I’ll hit you up later though. Oh, and tell Marcus I said hey and congratulations on the baby you’ve probably already made.”

  “Bitch! Don’t jinx me!”

  I cracked a real smile as I quickly replied, “Love you. Bye!” Before hanging up and strolling into work.

  As expected, the place was packed, forcing me to squeeze through the crowd to get to my station at the bar. And once I got there, the drink orders started pouring in to the point where I could hardly remember what I was mad about to begin with.

  Until he showed up.

  And not only did he show up, he showed up looking so damn good that I automatically began to hate the mother and father who I had yet to learn anything about for creating him. I hated the doctor who delivered him. I hated his barber for the last minute shape-up he must’ve gotten after I left for work. I hated his jeweler for selling him the diamond in his ear. I hated his… dentist for the pearly white smile I could see even from the opposite end of the bar.

  That was exactly where I planned to stay until he disappeared, though I could feel him watching my every move. It was… unnerving, and annoying, not to mention the multiple comments I got from some of my usual customers about it, all checking to make sure I was okay.

  But the tip of the iceberg was when Hope came my way to gush, “Levi Graham wants to talk to youuu.”

  Levi Graham as if he was some… mythical gift from God instead of my headass roommate.

  I rolled my eyes as I wiped my hands on a towel before heading his way, licking my chops in preparation for the fire I planned to unleash. And of course, while I was fueled by the negative, he was on the complete opposite end of the spectrum as his smile grew with every step I took.

  “Why are you here?”

  His arrogant smirk was also annoyingly handsome as he shrugged. “Had a long day at work. Got into a fight with my roommate. So I figured I come get a drink. Now what do you recommend, pretty girl?”

  “Devil’s piss.”

  His face twisted when he asked, “You’re joking, right?”

  And I was already busy gathering the materials to make it as I told him, “Actually I’m not. I mean, if you really need to get the edge off, it’s the perfect drink.”

  “How about a beer instead? I have workouts in the morning. Can’t be too fucked up.”

  I completely ignored his request, continuing to concoct my suggestion as I told him, “There are beers at home. You know, where you belong.”

  “Nah, I don’t feel very welcome there right now.”

  While I knew the angle he was taking, trying to guilt trip me into feeling bad for telling his ass off, I was sure to hold strong when I nonchalantly replied, “You’ve already paid a full two months’ worth of rent to live there. If that doesn’t make you feel like you belong, I truly don’t know what will.”

  “Maybe if my roommate wasn’t such a…”

  “A, what?” I asked, cutting him off and fully ready to toss the drink I had just finished making in his face.

  But I couldn’t do it once I saw the adorable smile he wore when he answered, “A little monster.”

  “That’ll be twelve dollars,” I replied as I slid the glass his way.

  And again his face was twisted when he asked, “Twelve dollars? How are you gonna charge me for a drink I didn’t even want?”

  I shrugged. “You never said you didn’t want it.”

  Before he could reply, a little voice nearby interrupted to say, “Don’t worry. It’s on me. I’m Layna.”

  My eyes were rolling harder than a PBA bowling ball on the last frame as I watched it all unfold; watched Levi get so easily sucked into the real mythical creature that was Layna of the infamous blog Layna’s Logic.

  While I never really had anything against her, had never knocked her game even after watching her go for one of my bosses who was deep in love at the time, seeing the way she preyed on Levi literally made me sick to my stomach. Though it was obvious he didn’t care nearly as much as he replied, “Levi. Levi Graham,” serving her the same smile he had been serving me all night and managing to piss me off all over again.

  There was no way I was going to admit why I felt the way I did, but I was more than tempted to once I watched Layna gush, “I know who you are, silly. I’ve been following your career since Duke. How are your knees?”

  He shrugged, taking a sip of the drink his little sponsor had yet to pay for before he answered, “They work like a charm.”

  “Mine do too.”

  “Twelve dollars, Layna,” I interjected, smiling with my mouth but scowling with my eyes.

  And the bitch had the nerve to give me a dismissive wave, keeping her eyes on my roommate as she said, “Just put it on my tab.”

  I could feel my blood boiling as I watched her and Levi share dreamy looks, her leaning in to whisper in his ear and him giving a
n obviously impressed nod at whatever hoe ass shit she was surely sharing. Probably the same hoe ass shit she shared on her wack ass blog.

  I released a heavy sigh, trying to calm myself down as I turned away to plug the drink order into her tab at the register. And when I finally turned back around, they were gone.

  Where the fuck did they go?

  I stepped onto the bottom rail of the bar, looking down both ends before I peeked out to the crowd and thankfully found them on the dance floor. Well… not exactly thankfully considering they were basically dry humping each other. But I suppose that was better than actual penetration.

  Why do you even care, Jules?

  I wasn’t interested in Levi. I didn’t even… like him. He was annoying, and arrogant, and irresponsible, and immature, and he pissed me off every chance he got. That was almost the exact recipe for, “Stay the fuck away from me before I cut you.”

  But the other deeper, darker side felt jealous as I watched him whisper something in Layna’s ear that made her giggle. The other deeper, darker side envied the way he wrapped an arm low against her waist as if they had known each other for months instead of minutes. The other deeper, darker side was getting red knuckles all over again as I squeezed his glass of half-drank Devil’s Piss in my hand and…

  “Shit!” I screamed as the glass cracked, shards falling all around me with a few small pieces lodged in my hand.

  While I knew it was impossible for all of the eyes in the lounge to be on me, that was exactly what it felt like as Hope screeched, “Jules! What happened?! Oh my God! You’re bleeding so much!”

  I looked down to my hand that was growing bloodier by the second, grabbing it at the wrist as I turned towards the back of the bar to the sink designed specifically for handwashing. I tried to stay cool as I watched the red flow of water rush down the drain, turning back to Hope to ask, “Can you sweep that glass up for me? I don’t want anybody to get hurt.”

  Her eyes were panicky as she nodded her head just as Kelvin swooped in to find out what was going on. “Damn, Jules. What the hell happened to you?”

  I turned the faucet off, grabbing a paper towel to hopefully stop some of the bleeding as I answered, “I… dropped the glass. And it broke.”